Reckless Beginnings Page 4

  Chapter 6

  The next morning, an intense throbbing headache woke Tammy up from a deep sleep. She slowly pulled herself into an upright position and pivoted her legs over the edge of the bed. Despite the pounding in her head showing no signs of mercy, she needed to find strength to face the new day. Grasping her temples with both hands, she moaned out loud. “Oh God, why did I have so much to drink last night?”

  Still in her now wrinkled uniform, which she no longer needed, Tammy slowly hoisted her limp, aching body to a standing position. With her eyes squinted, she tried to shut out the intensity of the bright daylight streaming through the curtainless window. With an almighty effort, she just about managed to raise her arm and look at her watch through narrowed, unfocused eyes. She saw it was ten o’clock and gasped. Her train to Surrey was departing in an hour!

  “Oh crap! You have to get a move on, Tammy!” she hollered to herself in a rush of panic, drowning out any previous thoughts of hangovers and headaches. With no time to waste, Tammy quickly gathered up her jeans and t-shirt that she had purposely laid out on top of her suitcase the day before and fled the room to take a shower. By ten thirty, and after a cold shower, she was dressed and feeling somewhat normal again. She picked up her suitcase and handbag and took one last look around her now empty flat. It had been home for almost two years. Now that it really was time to leave it, a weight of sadness pulled at her heart. “Farewell, flat, I’ll miss you,” she said softly before placing the key on the counter and heading out the door.

  The train station was six miles away. Knowing there was no time to wait for a bus, Tammy opted to walk the few streets into town and grab a taxi instead. She arrived at the station with just ten minutes to spare. Thankful her father had purchased the ticket in advance, she scurried over to the ticket booth to pick it up. The elderly man behind the counter informed her that the train was on time and would be leaving from platform nine in five minutes.

  With ticket in hand, she ran through the station as quickly as her old suitcase on frail, plastic wheels would allow. She reached the platform and checked in her luggage with the conductor before leaping on board the train to the sound of the final whistle for departure. Breathless but happy to find a window seat available, she plumped herself down in a state of exhaustion just as the train began to pull out of the station. This was it. Her journey to the United States had begun. She was finally on her way.

  As the train gained speed, she watched through the window as her hometown faded off into the distance. With mixed emotions, she whispered, “Goodbye, Leeds. I’ll come visit you again soon, I promise.”

  Still suffering from the previous night but delighted to have the double seat all to herself, Tammy lifted the arm to the adjoining seat and arranged her body comfortably by curling her legs up and resting her tired head against the window. She closed her eyes to block out the rays of mid-morning sun gleaming through the window, and in no time at all, she drifted off into a deep sleep. Images of her new life in the States painted themselves into her dreams; she was living in the big city—maybe it was New York—and she was driving a big American car. She was with friends and her sister Donna was with them too. She didn’t know where they were going, but they all seemed happy. They were living the American Dream.

  Stirring from her sleep, Tammy checked her watch, and re-checked when she realized she’d slept for most of the three-hour trip. Finally, the train pulled into the station and she quickly ran a brush through her hair and touched up her lipstick with her favorite color, Ruby Rose, before exiting and stepping onto the platform. Scanning across the sparse gathering of people waiting at the small, quiet station, it was easy to spot her father waving in the distance by the green wooden benches. She beamed a radiant smile and waved both hands above her head in excitement as he began to walk toward her.

  Spanning her shoulders with his arm, her father gave her a tight squeeze and a cheerful grin. “You made it!”

  “I did,” Tammy said with pride.

  John loosened his grip so Tammy could turn to face him. “I wasn’t sure if I would. I didn’t realize how much there was to do in just a week, but I managed to get it all done…just! And here I am.” Still smiling, she continued to tell him more. “Last night, my work threw me a brilliant leaving party. It was a total surprise!” She gasped, remembering her shock of everything from the night before. “I had no clue. I don’t know how they pulled it off without me knowing, but they did.”

  “That’s great! They must have liked you a lot to go to all that trouble. Sounds like they gave you a really good send off,” John remarked while they stood waiting for her suitcase to be unloaded from the train. “You can tell me all about it when we’re in the car. Aunt Maddie and Uncle Dave can’t wait to see you.”

  “And I can’t wait to see them! It’s been a long time. I haven’t seen them in ages…in fact, I don’t think I’ve seen them since you and Mom got divorced.”

  “Well, looks like your suitcase is ready,” her dad replied, pointing to the cartful of unloaded luggage. “Let me grab it for you and we’ll make a move.”

  Smiling from ear to ear, Tammy replied, “Great, thanks. One step closer to America!”

  Chapter 7

  It was only a fifteen-minute drive to her aunt and uncle’s house. It looked exactly how she remembered it. They’d lived on the quiet cul-de-sac for more than twenty years. Raising two sons, Peter and Shawn, who now had families of their own, they’d lived the old-fashioned life, with Maddie staying at home to look after the boys while Dave worked to provide for the family. All the houses in the neighborhood were elegant detached family homes with immaculate well-maintained gardens. Her aunt’s house, located at the end of the road, still had the white painted siding and black decorative shutters that Tammy remembered so well. The quintessential picket fence, still laced with white roses, brought her right back to her childhood days.

  As they slowly pulled into the driveway, Tammy couldn’t help but smile as she watched her aunt come rushing out of the front door and skip with joy down the three front steps. Trembling with excitement, she anxiously waited for them to exit the car. Tammy was delighted to see Aunt Maddie still looked the same and didn’t appear to have aged much over the years. Still wearing her shoulder-length, sable-brown hair clipped away from her ever-youthful face, it was clear to see time had been good to her.

  Aunt Maddie was most famous in Tammy’s family for two things: her cooking and for always wearing brightly colored aprons. Today, she didn’t disappoint, as she had chosen to wear a luminous pink apron with vertical red stripes. The minute Tammy stepped out of the car, Aunt Maddie squealed with delight and engulfed Tammy in her arms, holding her cheek to cheek while squeezing her tightly.

  “My dear Tammy, it’s so good to see you!”

  “Hi, Auntie Maddie. It’s good to see you too,” Tammy managed to say, still being smothered by her aunt’s embrace.

  Finally releasing her hold, Maddie took a step back while holding Tammy at arm’s length. She took a good long look at her, inspecting her from head to toe, and smiled with pride. “Look at you. You’re all grown up and so pretty. I just love your beautiful red hair,” she said, combing it with her fingers. She turned her head in the direction of John, who was busy unloading Tammy’s suitcase from the boot of the car. “She definitely has your Irish blood, John.”

  “What makes you say that?” John said sarcastically.

  Maddie laughed. “Oh, give over, John. Still sarcastic as ever, I see.” Pulling Tammy by her hand, she headed back towards the house. “Come on inside and let me fix you both something to eat. You must be starving after that long train ride.”

  “I’ll be right in. You two go ahead,” John replied.

  Entering the house, Tammy’s head was once again flooded with childhood memories. Nothing had changed. It was an open-plan home with no shortage of natural sunlight, thanks to the generous amount of windows. A white-tiled kitchen bar, complete with ornate wooden stools, separa
ted the kitchen from the main living and dining area. Glass French doors from the dining room opened out onto a large brick patio, furnished with a round wooden table and chairs. The outdoor seating area was dressed with red and white floral cushions and shaded by a matching umbrella. Maddie’s china collection, consisting of delicate teacups, teapots and plates, was displayed around the dining room on high wooden shelves, adding an essence of English charm to the decor.

  In no time at all, Aunt Maddie got busy in the kitchen, doing what she loved best: entertaining and cooking. Tammy took a seat at the counter and engaged in cheerful conversation and laughter while her aunt glided around the kitchen with ease, fixing a hearty-looking lunch.

  “I bet you’re excited about moving to America. What a fantastic opportunity,” Maddie remarked while slicing up some turkey.

  “I am, but I’m a bit worried about Mom. I don’t think she likes the idea.”

  “Oh, don’t you worry about Rose. I’m sure she’ll be just fine. Maybe a little lonely at times, but Jenny will be just a few hours away. Now, where is your dad? These sandwiches are almost ready.”

  After unloading the car and taking the suitcases upstairs, John joined them in the kitchen. Feeling famished, his eyes almost popped out of his head as he welcomed the oversized turkey sandwich that his sister placed before him.

  With lunch devoured and stomachs filled, they took advantage of the pleasantly warm afternoon by relaxing outside on the patio.

  Tammy thought back to all the Christmases spent at her aunt’s house, when cousins, aunts, uncles and grandparents traveled from all corners of England to come together for the festive activities. It saddened her that many of the families from back then, including her own, were no longer together. All had gone their separate ways. Sadly, annual holiday gatherings were now something of the past.

  Her daydream was interrupted by her father.

  “I meant to tell you this earlier, but I’ve not been able to get a word in edgeways with you and your aunt nattering all afternoon. Your mother is coming down tomorrow by train.”

  “She is?” Tammy replied excitedly. “Oh, that’s fantastic! Auntie, when was the last time you saw my mom? It’s been ages, hasn’t it?”

  “Oh my goodness, I’m not sure. But yes, it has been a rather long time,” Maddie said, serving everyone a cup of tea.

  “She’ll only be here for the day. We’ll have to pick her up from the train station in the morning,” John stated.

  “Oh, I can’t wait to see her. It’s going to be just like old times,” Maddie said, clasping her hands together in joy.

  Later that evening, Uncle Dave returned home from his lifetime job as an insurance salesman. Tammy had never known him to do anything else. He hadn’t changed much either, except for the few gray strands invading his light hazelnut hair, which he wore short and well-trimmed. He was still the tall and lanky uncle with the prominent nose and sharp chin that Tammy remembered.

  He set his briefcase on the floor at the bottom of the stairs and walked over to Tammy to give her a big hug. “Tammy, sweetheart, it’s so good to see you! Hey, what happened? You’re not a little girl anymore.”

  Tammy chuckled. “Good to see you too, Uncle Dave.”

  For dinner, Aunt Maddie treated everyone to some of her homemade cooking and filled their plates with roast beef, Yorkshire pudding, mashed potatoes, and gravy. Fresh-baked apple pie and custard followed for dessert. After the delicious meal, John and Dave retired to the den for what would probably turn into an intense game of chess. Both were brilliant chess players and no doubt eager to finally have a game against a challenging opponent. Tammy, tired from her trip and sensing it might be a long game, decided to leave them to it and called it an early night.

  Anticipating the arrival of her mother was also weighing heavy on her mind, adding to her fatigue. Saying goodbye to her wasn’t going to be easy, and Tammy was worried her mother may dissolve into an emotional wreck during their final farewell. Although she was expecting there to be some tears shed between them, she didn’t want it to be any harder than it needed to be.

  Chapter 8

  Her mother’s train arrived on time at precisely ten o’clock the following morning. Tammy and her father waited anxiously on the platform as they watched the train slowly pull into the station and come to a halt amid a billowing cloud of steam and smoke. Up until now, Tammy had been okay with saying goodbye to her mother, but as she stood waiting for her to exit the train, she could feel her levels of anxiety beginning to increase. First came the sweaty palms, then the butterflies churning through her stomach. Trying to sooth herself, she gently rubbed her belly in a circular motion. It didn’t help. Instead, feelings of dizziness and nausea began to creep in, and her heart hammered against her ribcage.

  It occurred to her that this wasn’t going to be easy, even after living by herself for almost two years; her mother had always been just a train ride away. After tomorrow, she’ll be six thousand miles away. No longer would she be able to simply jump on a train whenever she felt the need to visit her mother. Tammy had never realized how much she took her for granted; not until this moment.

  Lost in her thoughts, Tammy suddenly spotted her mother stepping off the train and quickly changed her state of mind. “I can do this,” she whispered to herself. She held her head an inch or two higher as if to convince herself it was all going to be fine.

  She admired her mother from afar, dressed casual and looking good in blue jeans, a purple t-shirt, and black low-heeled pumps. She carried a black purse over her shoulder and a black cardigan hung loosely over her arm. Her mother had always taken pride in the good looks she was gifted with, and enhanced them perfectly with just the right amount of makeup. She never had a hair out of place and her nails were always beautifully manicured.

  “There she is, Dad,” Tammy said while waving to her mother.

  Rose spotted them right away. She smiled and waved back.

  Tammy took a deep breath and exhaled just as sharply before walking toward her. As they grew closer, Tammy quickened her pace, greeting her mother with open arms and smothering her with a loving embrace. “Hi, Mom, it’s so good to see you.”

  Rose gave her a peck on the cheek. “You too, dear.” She turned to her ex- husband and gave him a courteous but friendly hug. “Hello, John,” she said, using a dry, flat tone, clearly sparing no emotion.

  “Hello, Rose,” John replied, matching her flat tone with one of his own.

  The tension between them was undeniable. Tammy sensed her mother’s sadness. Her father chose to be quiet as they walked back to the car, walking two steps behind them while Tammy held her mother’s hand and made small talk. Rose made light conversation about the brilliant train ride and the nice weather they were enjoying.

  Rose’s state of mind improved when she was told they would be having lunch at Maddie’s and, as expected, the reunion was bittersweet, continuing where they had left off all those years ago. It seemed time had stood still for the two of them. With so much to say to each other, neither one could speak fast enough.

  Tammy’s attempts to join in on their witty conversation and their reminiscing about the good old days had failed miserably. Caught up in the moment of seeing each other again seemed to have made them oblivious to Tammy’s presence. She chuckled to herself and opted to take a back seat at one of the barstools, resigned to the fact that it might take the ladies a while to fix lunch.

  While the women chatted, Tammy glanced out at the patio and saw her father and uncle had stepped outside, presumably so Uncle Dave could have a cigarette. Aunt Maddie had never smoked and wouldn’t allow it in the house. After all the excitement of the morning, the thought of a cigarette appealed to Tammy, so she decided to leave her mother and aunt to their happy reunion and joined the men in the backyard for a smoke before lunch.

  After a fulfilling lunch, consisting of roast beef sandwiches and salad, Tammy and her mother decided to take a walk down the road to the local pub. Tammy neede
d some time alone with her to have a heart-to-heart chat and see where she stood with the move.

  Once at the pub, they found a quiet corner booth and sat across from each other. It was still early afternoon so the pub was relatively quiet, which pleased them both given the sombre circumstances. Within a few minutes, a young waitress with a blonde ponytail approached their table and took Tammy’s order of two glasses of wine.

  Rose purposely avoided eye contact with her daughter and stared down at her glass with a forlorn expression while circling the rim with her index finger as she spoke. “So, this time tomorrow, you’ll be on an airplane on your way to the States.”

  “Mom, I know you’re not entirely happy about this, but you’ve also known this is something I’ve wanted for such a long time.” Tammy reached for her mother’s hand. “I’m going to miss you so much, and I promise you I’ll keep in touch…even though you’re afraid I won’t,” Tammy said, trying to reassure her.

  Rose looked up to meet her daughter’s eyes and spoke softly. “Tammy, sweetheart, don’t get me wrong. I’m really happy for you.” She paused, closing her eyes briefly. “It’s just so sudden. In the back of my mind, I’ve always known this day would eventually come, but now that it’s here and everything is happening so fast…well, I’m having a hard time dealing with it.” Rose swallowed the lump in her throat and quickly continued before Tammy had a chance to respond. “Little by little, I’m losing my family. First your father, then Donna, and now my youngest. Jenny is the only one left. And that’s another thing. Jenny is going to be furious when she finds out you left without saying goodbye to her.”

  “I’ll write her a long letter. I promise. I’ll make it right, Mom.” This wasn’t easy, Tammy thought. She hated to see her mother hurting, especially since she was the cause of her pain. Wishing she could make it easier, but not knowing how, frustrated Tammy beyond reason. Squeezing her mother’s hand harder, she tried desperately to cheer her up with smiles and by speaking with a more confident and happy tone. Then, suddenly, she remembered her father’s promise. “Hey, Dad said he would buy you a plane ticket to come visit me next year. You’ve never been to the States, Mom. I bet you’ll love it!”