Reckless Beginnings Read online

  Rose huffed at her daughter’s comment. “I’m not going to hold my breath, Tammy. Knowing your father, he’s just saying that to make me feel better.”

  Rolling her eyes, Tammy sighed. “Oh, come on, Mom…I’ll make sure he sticks to his word.” Wanting to sound sincere and convince her mother that everything was going to be okay, Tammy repeated herself. “I promise.”

  Her mother wasn’t buying it and remained stubborn, shaking her head from side to side as she spoke. “Honestly, Tammy, I just don’t like the idea of you being so far away. I know you’re all grown up now and you’ve lived on your own for quite some time, but you’re still my youngest daughter. You’re my baby! I’m sorry, I’m just having a hard time letting you go.”

  “Mom, I’m going to be living with Dad. Doesn’t that make you feel a little better? It’s not like I’ll be all by myself in some strange country. To be perfectly honest, it’s going to feel weird living with a parent again.”

  “I know. It’s just me being me, and I’ll deal with it the best I can. I’m not trying to make this harder for you or make you feel worse than you already do, but I’m going to miss you so much when you’re gone. I know Donna was much younger when she went to go live with your father and got into all sorts of trouble. I just hope you’re more mature and won’t make the same mistakes she did.” Tears began to roll down Rose’s cheeks. “It tears me apart not knowing where she is or what’s happened to her. I ask myself every day. Is she still alive? Does she have a home?” Pulling a tissue from her handbag and wiping her eyes, Rose continued to speak between sobs. “Why doesn’t she write to any of us to let us know she’s okay? Is it because she’s dead? I don’t know what to think anymore, Tammy, and I’m afraid I may lose you next.”

  Tammy walked around the table and hugged her mother from behind. She couldn’t stand to see her cry. “Oh, Mom, I’m sure she’s okay. Whatever reason she has for not contacting us, I’m sure it’s a good one. I’m certain we’ll hear from her…all in good time.”

  Her mother wiped her eyes again with her now saturated tissue and squeezed her daughter’s hand. “I’m sure you’re right, dear. It’s just the not knowing that’s driving me crazy.” Attempting to gather her composure, Rose shook her hair and raised her head. She let go of Tammy’s hand and dabbed her eyes one last time. “Okay, enough of this talk. Let’s enjoy the rest of our visit. My train leaves in a few hours, so I want to make the most of what little time I have left with you.”

  Tammy admired and appreciated her mother for being strong for her benefit, despite the obvious hurt she was feeling. “Okay, Mom, you’ve got it,” Tammy said with a smile while picking up the two empty glasses. “Why don’t I get us a couple more drinks?”

  “That would be nice. Thank you.”

  The next hour proved to be much better. Finally, Tammy was coming to terms with and feeling more comfortable about leaving her mother. Yes, it was going to be hard, but Tammy promised to shorten the distance between them with as many phone calls and letters as she could.

  When the time came to return to the train station, Rose surprisingly managed to keep herself together. Only a few departing tears were shed as Tammy and her mother said their goodbyes. Standing on the platform while waving at the departing train, Tammy knew she and her mother were both going to be okay.

  Chapter 9

  Two months had passed since Tammy left England. Now she was settled and living with her father and step-mother, Joanne, in the small town of Lonesridge, located in Northern California.

  Joanne had a feeling she would be returning with John. They had discussed the idea before he left, so it was no surprise to her when he called with his arrival times and casually mentioned that he had a companion with him. She knew right away it was Tammy. Excited to finally be meeting John’s youngest daughter, she made every effort to make her feel welcome and at home.

  Her father’s house was an older two-story, five-bedroom, two-bath home perched high on a hill overlooking Lonesridge. The outside of the home had white siding, black trim, and a large front porch that spanned the full width of the house. Stone steps led up to a heavy wooden front door and pots filled with mums and pink roses were placed sporadically around the porch. Three white ceiling fans spanned the area for hot summer days. A white wicker loveseat and matching chairs with colorful flowery cushions made it an inviting and relaxing place to lounge around and read a good book.

  A beautiful rock wall surrounded the grassy lawn in front and continued around to the large back yard. More grass carpeted the garden with surrounding apple, plum, and apricot trees. Blackberries and raspberries made their homes along the back wall.

  Originally, the house had had three bedrooms and a bathroom on the ground floor, and three more bedrooms and another bathroom upstairs. John had turned one of the upstairs bedrooms into his office, and Joanne had done the same with one of the bedroom’s downstairs. To make the living room bigger, they’d knocked out a wall to one of the other bedrooms, leaving one bedroom and bathroom overlooking the backyard on the ground floor. This was Tammy’s room.

  As the focal point of the open-plan living room and dining room, an antique cast iron wood stove stood on a stone hearth against the east wall. Both John and Joanne were avid book readers, evident with the floor-to-ceiling bookshelves that lined every room, including the bedrooms. Her father still didn’t have a TV, which reminded Tammy of her childhood days. She grew up with her father preferring the company of a good book over watching television. Although, occasionally, he gathered the family around the dining room table to play board games instead.

  Tammy and her mother always welcomed game night. It was a time for bonding and spending quality time with the otherwise busy man of the house. Rose would spend hours in the kitchen preparing a delicious feast while Tammy settled down at the table, eager to learn new board game strategies from her father. Always feeling intimidated by their father’s strict working conditions when he was home, Donna and Jenny couldn’t warm up to their father so easily. For them, game night was an order by their father, not a choice.

  Like her mother, Joanne stayed home and took care of Tammy’s new half- brother, Andrew. With the pressures of raising a toddler, Joanne struggled to keep a clean house; dishes were constantly piled in the sink, toys were scattered throughout the house, and dirty clothes were always piled high on the tiled floor of the laundry room.

  Because Tammy had entered the States on a visitor’s visa, she was unable to work. Being her sponsor, her father had filed papers with the Immigration Department to change her status to a green card within a week of her arrival. Once approved—which could take months if not years—she would finally be able to not only work but also learn to drive. In the meantime, she was happy to help Joanne around the house and watch Andrew when needed.

  Being a writer, her father insisted on peace and quiet most of the time. Now with a toddler in the house, that had become impossible, except during nap times. Frustrated, he decided to rent an office above a store in town and was now working outside the home much of the time.

  On the increasingly rare occasions he was home, Joanne and Tammy tried their best to keep the house quiet, but they often failed. Like most toddlers, Andrew frequently had temper tantrums. During such incidents, they would first hear the heavy footsteps of her father marching across the office floor above them, then they’d hear the office door slam and the stomping of his feet down the stairs. In a heated state, he’d give them a snarl followed by a string of grunts and moans as he stormed out of the house, slamming the door behind him.

  Once he was out of the house, Tammy and Joanne would simply look at each other, shrug their shoulders, smirk a little bit at his child-like behavior and continue on with their business. To Tammy, this was all too familiar. “Some things just never change,” she often chuckled to herself.

  Following these incidents, they both knew he would probably spend the night at the office, only to return the next morning, chirpy and happy, acti
ng as if nothing had happened. For Tammy, it was like history repeating itself, but Joanne had learnt to accept his moods and never question them—just like Tammy’s mother had done.

  Surprisingly, Tammy sometimes found herself homesick for England. She missed her friends, her independence, and even her ex-boyfriend. With nothing exciting to report, she hadn’t kept her promise to write to her friends. Because she couldn’t work or drive, she hadn’t been anywhere or met anyone new. Although it saddened her to say it, her life had become boring. It was nothing like she had imagined or hoped for, and she was feeling somewhat disappointed. The truth was, she had no friends, no social life, no boyfriend, and her sex life had been non-existent since her arrival.

  The hunt for Donna was at a dead end with nothing to go on. She had made inquiry phone calls to the children’s home and to the detective in charge of the case, but they weren’t able to tell her anything she didn’t already know. They were waiting for some kind of lead to pop up, but so far, nothing had. Tammy asked if there was anything she should be doing, but the police said they’d already done everything possible. Despite photos being strung throughout the Boston area and the staff and older children from the home having been interviewed extensively, no one seemed to know anything. Now all they could do was wait.

  She wrote only to her mother and Jenny, but lied by telling them she was happy and loving her new life in the States. Her relationship with Jenny had become strained since she left without saying goodbye. Tammy tried to make amends with a long letter filled with numerous apologies, but Jenny never acknowledged them or officially accepted her apology. In the time she had been in the States, she had only received one letter from her, and that was just to say how disappointed she was that Tammy had upped and left without a word. She understood Jenny’s anger and blamed only herself.

  Tammy found adjusting to living back with parents beyond difficult. After living on her own, she now had to live by their rules and respect the eleven o’clock curfew they had given her. So, especially without a car, she was limited on where she could go.

  Being a small town, Lonesridge had no bus or taxi service, but Main Street was within walking distance of the house. As the core of the town, with a variety of restaurants and shops, it was here where she spent many afternoons strolling and browsing. Her favorite place to go was the small park at the top of Main Street. An area of shade trees and green grass, scattered with wooden park benches and picnic tables. It was a place visited by daily shoppers taking a rest, children playing on the grass, and proud dog owners walking their pets. On the days Joanne didn’t need Tammy’s help, she often spent time alone at the park under a shade tree with a good book.

  While spending one such afternoon at the park engrossed in her latest read, she lost track of time. Glancing down at her watch, she saw it was almost dinner time. Knowing Joanne would be needing her help, she gathered up her things and headed home.

  Upon entering the house, the essence of a home-cooked meal filled the air. Damn, what smells so good? she thought while drawing more of the aroma through her nose.

  After setting down her bag in the most convenient place, which happened to be the couch, she made her way toward the already set dining room table where she noticed another plate had been added. She smiled down at her little brother and watched him playing contently with his wooden blocks in the playpen.

  She heard Joanne, who obviously hadn’t realized Tammy was home, in the kitchen and called in her direction. “Hi, Joanne, I’m home. Do you need help with anything?”

  Amongst the clatter of dishes, she heard Joanne reply, “Hi, Tammy, no thanks. I think I have it under control. We’re having meatloaf for dinner. Just keep an eye on Andrew for me, if you wouldn’t mind?”

  “Sure, no problem.” Tammy bent down and gathering Andrew in her arms; he was still amused by the one block he was holding. Tammy took a seat at the table and bounced him on her knees while he continued to play.

  “I see there’s another place set for dinner. Are we having company?” Tammy asked.

  “Yes, Raymond is joining us,” Joanne replied as she came out of the kitchen, wiping her hands with a dish towel and taking a seat at the table across from her.

  “Who’s he?”

  “Oh, he’s a good friend of your father. He owns the contracting company that did the renovations on this house.”

  “What about his wife? Won’t she be coming?”

  Joanne shook her head and chuckled. “Oh, Raymond isn’t the marrying kind. He’s a few years younger than your dad, but he has no kids and has never been married. In my opinion, I don’t think he ever will. He likes to play around too much.” She then added in a whisper, “Between you and me, he seems to have a different woman every month. Although him and your dad are very good friends, his personal life is really none of our business.”

  Amused by her comments, Tammy laughed. “Ahh, I see. What time is he coming over?” Tammy asked while putting Andrew back in his playpen.

  Joanne glanced down at her watch. “In about an hour. Which gives me just enough time to shower and freshen up before he arrives.” She quickly stood up and removed her apron. “Mind if I leave you in charge of Andrew? Maybe you can take him out in the backyard for a while and let him play outside before dinner?”

  “Of course. Go take your shower.” As Joanne headed upstairs, Tammy turned to her little brother. “Come on, big fella. Let’s go play outside,” she cooed, heading out the back door.

  While watching Andrew play in the green turtle sandbox, Tammy hadn’t heard her father come home. Startled by his presence at the back door, she jerked her head in surprise when he called out across the yard.

  “Hi, Tammy, where’s Joanne?”

  “Hi, Dad, I didn’t hear you come in. She’s upstairs taking a shower.”

  “Oh, okay. I’m off to take one too. Can you listen for the front door? Raymond is coming for dinner tonight.”

  “Yes, I know. Joanne already told me. I’ll take Andrew indoors so I can hear him knock. He’s beginning to get bored with the sandbox anyway.”

  “Thanks. I won’t be long.”

  Tammy picked up Andrew, brushed the sand off his clothes, and headed for the living room. He smiled and made a chorus of loud baby noises as she placed him down on a blanket in the middle of the room and showered him with wooden blocks and colorful books. Feeling content, she watched him happily while she waited for their guest to arrive.

  Chapter 10

  Fifteen minutes later, there was a knock at the front door. Keeping an eye on her brother, Tammy left him to play while she answered it.

  When she opened the door, she froze. Time stood still. Subconsciously, her jaw dropped. Before her stood an extremely handsome man holding a bottle of red wine. This was Raymond? Dad’s friend? was her first thought. He was tall with short brown hair, a broad, dark moustache, and high cheekbones that looked chiseled into his somewhat chubby cheeks, which had a slight distinction of redness to them—in an attractive way. Tammy wasn’t sure if he was cold or just blushing, but as she stood in the doorway staring at him, Tom Selleck came to mind.

  She lost herself in his deep blue eyes, framed by long, thick black eyelashes. When he flashed a heart-warming smile, she found herself being drawn in even more. He wore blue jeans, blue loafers, and a blue and white checked shirt with the top buttons undone, revealing a few dark chest hairs.

  Joanne had told her that he was just a few years younger than her father, but he seemed a lot younger. She could feel her heart rate increasing and soon realized she’d been staring at him in silence with her mouth drooped open like a puppy dog.

  He spoke softly, albeit with a hint of nervousness, in a manly, alluring voice. “Er, hi. Is John home? You must be his daughter. Tammy, right?”

  “Oh, yes. I’m so sorry. Hello,” she said, feeling utterly stupid and embarrassed for gawking at him. She pushed the door open with the back of her body and motioned him inside with her hand. “Come on in. My dad and Joa
nne will be down shortly.” She led him toward the couch. “Please have a seat on the settee. I’m just watching Andrew for a moment.”

  As he walked by her, she couldn’t help noticing the pleasant scent of masculine cologne trailing behind him like an invisible shadow. Tammy’s eyes continued to follow him as he took a seat on the brown leather couch. After making himself comfortable, Tammy saw he was still holding the bottle of wine. “Here, let me take that from you,” she said while reaching for the bottle.

  “Thanks,” he said as he handed it to her. His friendly smile and perfect white teeth warmed her. Casually, she walked over to the dining room table and set the bottle down.

  Since arriving home from the park, Tammy hadn’t had a chance to freshen up or change. She felt under-dressed in her blue jeans, black cowboy boots, red t-shirt, and minimal makeup. Feeling nervous, she avoided eye contact with Raymond and took a seat in the armchair across the room next to Andrew, who was still happily playing on the blanket. With a moment of uncomfortable silence, Tammy took the edge off by twiddling her fingers and directing her attention to her little brother. Finally, Raymond broke the silence.

  “So, how do you like living here in the States?”

  Trying to act normal and not let her racing heart control her, Tammy forced a calm voice. “I love it. It’s a lot different from England though, and I’m still trying to get used to all the changes.”

  Raymond gave her another one of his warm smiles. “I’m sure it’s quite a change. I spoke to John a few weeks ago. He mentioned you were here but, of course, being your dad, he didn’t tell me how pretty you were.”

  Surprise by his comment, Tammy brushed it off as him merely trying to be polite and thanked him with a subtle shy smile.